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19 December 2014, 13:39
Because that's what you need, right?
If you feel as though your sexting game is getting a little stale, then there's a new Twitter bot in town to help you re-ignite the spark.
sext: you indulge in my midnight snack...i increase my portion size— how 2 sext (@wikisext) December 17, 2014
...or, um, not?
@wikisext, co-created by Twitter users @rumnogg and @thricedotted, is a Twitter bot account that gleans information from articles on popular how-to lifesaver WikiHow. It picks out snippets of sentences or paragraphs from the site to Tweet completely out of context; oh, and then it adds "sext:" at the beginning. That's how you know it's a sext.
There are some real flirty winners amongst the babble.
sext: i carelessly make her feel special as you slowly caress her cheeks and hair— how 2 sext (@wikisext) December 18, 2014
Though some others are a little questionable at best.
sext: i place my stain on layers of paper towels— how 2 sext (@wikisext) December 19, 2014
And some are a window into a sex life I want absolutely no knowledge or part of.
sext: i make my hole in my bottle while you get my bucket— how 2 sext (@wikisext) December 17, 2014
There's an element of surrealism to it almost on par with the legendary @horse_ebooks, though maybe without the directionless chaotic fury.
I used to hear a LOUD BUZZING NOISE in my head I used to think there was NO ESCAPE I used to feel a SMOTHERING and CRUSHING sensation I— Horse ebooks (@Horse_ebooks) September 5, 2013
But it doesn't have to be all about the sexting: @wikisext has a tip for everything (even if it's described as a sext).
@wikisext will be there if you need some self-affirmation:
sext: i realize that my life is important— how 2 sext (@wikisext) December 14, 2014
Or some cooking advice:
sext: i add my carrots to the water and set my timer for 2-5 minutes— how 2 sext (@wikisext) December 15, 2014
Or even if you need encouragement to stop wasting your day reading weird Twitter accounts:
sext: you find new ways to fill your time— how 2 sext (@wikisext) December 18, 2014